Singing is my way of processing and dealing with my emotions in a healthy way. It's an indescribable feeling of fulfillment and joy when you're able to personally connect to a song. I am not always able to sing as much as I would like to. But whenever I can, I will sing my little heart out <3
What is your creative outlet? How do you process your emotions in a healthy way?
"Anything Worth Holding On To" | By Scott Alan
Inspired by Matt Bloyd and Chrissy Metz's Version
My Fibromyalgia Story
At the age of 9, I had been experiencing excruciating pain on my legs that prevented me from getting any ounce of sleep. I would often cry, uncontrollably jerk my legs, stretch, and apply as much pressure as I could in an attempt to relieve the pain. My pediatrician insisted that it was just GROWING PAINS!! However......I didn't grow much (Height: 4.11) and the pain never went away.
I was labeled as lazy, an attention seeker, and overly dramatic. Those around me just weren't understanding what was really going on with me. I didn't know myself. I just knew that the pain I was feeling was very real and intense. I also struggled with fatigue and falling asleep. I was lacking so much energy and had no idea why.
It wasn't until 2020 that I was finally diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Restless Leg Syndrome.
About 4 million of the American population suffers from Fibromyalgia. This includes women, men, and CHILDREN. Fibromyalgia is often misunderstood and met with controversy due to a common misconception that this condition is "all in our heads." This misconception leads to medical gaslighting, which I unfortunately have too much experience with. "You're too young to have that," is what I am constantly being told by doctors. Due to my age, ethnicity, and gender, I constantly have to advocate for myself. They sometimes talk to me as if they know my body better than me when I am living in it.
I recently had to change my doctor because she refused to believe me and take the necessary testing I needed......Once I switched doctors, I found out that I was right all along. The way she treated me was one of the most awful experiences I've ever had. It also sometimes feels as though they think I will miraculously get better since I am young. I don't understand that.
All sufferers want is to be HEARD and UNDERSTOOD. They want to know that what they're saying and feeling is being validated. We need to talk about Fibromyalgia more. I wasn't even aware of this condition until I was diagnosed. We must spread awareness and inform others. I shouldn't be learning more from social communities than from my own doctors. I understand that there is no cure and that little is known about this condition. But seeing my doctor use Google in front on me to answer my question is not a reassuring feeling.
Some Symptoms I Currently Experience
Muscle and bone pain (Tender Points)
Anxiety & Depression
Easily Bruise - Sensitive Skin
and so on......... (too many + I discover new ones everyday)
I use to believe that these were normal until I realized that they weren't. I am still learning everyday about my own body. This includes recognizing and listening to my limits.
Over the course of the pandemic, my body has changed drastically and it will never be the same. However, I am learning to accept my condition and adjust to a new way of living. I will always be in pain, but I will never stop moving forward.